Breaking up with someone with BPD
Dear BPDSecrets, tell@bpdsecrets.com
Here are my thoughts on breaking up with someone with BPD.
When it comes to breaking up with someone with BPD, I spent one year this week with my bpd bf. he's beautiful, physically, emotionally… at times. these times are farther and fewer between though and one year later with three breakups behind me (he came back when he became lonely) i am without a job, my utilities are off and my car insurance and rent are… well.. you get it. i am a lot older than him, and he had one previous angel before me, whose life he pretty much crushed too. it's taken this long for me to wake up and listen to every one of my friends yell "RUN!!" I even ended up in jail because i didn't want to tell the cops what really happened when he tackled and threatened to kill me. because i scratched his face in self-defense, and because they (the cops) had already been there before a couple times, they took me in to jail too. and out of embarrassment, i waited to see the judge instead of calling my family (cuz i didn't want them to tell me to stay away from him.) i ended up missing my start-day at a new job .. and this is just the beginning of my descent into homelessness. I had to send my kids away, believe me, i never thought i would be in this position especially over some other human being whom I thought loved me deeply. If you guys are in this position and don't want to leave cuz you feel bad or guilty or are still too in love, listen to me! love yourself!! your vision has been clouded. when you get yourself healthy again, your ex-bpd partner will look very very ugly to you. good luck! If you are thinking about breaking up with someone with BPD a need to think long and hard about your own safety and well-being.
-anonymous
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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
well for me .. i`m a guy i loved my ex .. i told her lets take it slow .. she had other things in mind she jumped into kissing and stuff .. so i thought maybe we had the right connection .. i`m a smart guy good looking very hyper active and everything .. . she was smart too but i didnt think she was dumb to dump me .. so when she did it she left me for her ex .. i felt like i was used sexually and emtionaly .. cuz i cared about her alot and i dont like to be used so i wanted to kill her .. i sent her so many msgs of how she is a sult and a bitch .. its been almost a year now i still think of hurting her its hard to forgive she told me she never imgined i would do this the gossping , the web gossping and other crazy stuff and letin her live up in fear .. well she messed me up but it was more like one eye for three eyes .. i`m a bipolar and i belive its also my part to pick the right gf for myself and try to control such sad moments cuz its really hard to deal with ..
To the above comment: no one deserves to be treated the way you describe you treated her! Yes she is not perfect and you will not find a perfect girlfriend. You are bipolar and you must know the flaws you have. Only love can create love. No love will come out of gossiping, internet gossiping and such. That is abuse!
Not saying it was right what she did. But it is up to you to show her what is the right and respectful way. And I am pretty sure there is two sides to this story.
OMG, you sound like my BPD boyfriend with the 3 eyes for 1 eye crap>< And the gossiping about her, etc…. Are you sure you aren't BPD too? lol He's all focused on revenge and getting back at people 10x as hard as they hurt him… That's sick…